Saturday, May 19, 2012

Vertical Dog vs. Horizontal Man

By Meg Curtis
MSN offers two reports on May 19, 2012, which form a right angle. First, a fluffy canine treads the sidewalk on two back legs, holding the torso proudly so the perspective is above the knees. The dog dances down a community street here:
Next, a thirty-three year-old male of the human species requests relief from the court for the thirty offspring he produced out-of-wedlock—almost one child per year of his life.  Surprisingly, the man shows his face here:
The solution for the man’s problem could not be clearer, thanks to MSN’s staging the two stories in immediate proximity. If the man spent his career in a vertical position—say, as a bank teller, counting money—would he still have time to clutter the street with offspring whom he can ill afford?
Math and integrity match when it comes to careers. Apparently, the dog in this case aims at an upright life—even if the creature must swing that backbone until it must hurt, for four-legged creatures carry their weight distributed among four feet, which usually supply stability for a spine beginning at the neck and ending with a ballast of a tail.
In this dog’s case, though, the canine imitates the child attached to the dog with an umbilical leash. It doesn’t need prodding—just dances right along behind the child, who plays the role of a responsible parent. Monkey see, monkey do?  No! This dog must see better than a monkey that, if the dog wishes to be taken for a walk in the human fashion, then the dog will cough up the extra change to perfect the masquerade.
The reverse observation completes as the viewer acknowledges: Yes, the male of the human species could assume the role of parent, too.  That change would also require that he become a father with an umbilical leash to remind him: The child starved of love and support may forget he can proceed upright, and lie down on the job.
But, just like the dog in this case, the human child does more than tricks when it rewards its master’s love. For THAT, it will walk any way a father demonstrates will bring unceasing rewards. For THAT, it may even change into a human being, dance down the street—right to the employment office and woof its way to promotions bringing Dad’s tie, vest, and timepiece.
For the complete stories, including incriminating photos and video, be sure to check out MSN NOW What’s Trending on Saturday, May 19, 2012, at 2:59 pm. Let’s hope this trend reverses faster than readers can say:  “Oh no, not another human circus story!” 

Chen Guangcheng Comes to America

By Meg Curtis

Imagine experiencing the United States of America as a blind Chinese refugee. Try describing a Chinese American restaurant to a Chinese national. Try explaining why Americans take vacations on Labor Day. These challenges pale beside encountering a nation of 313,573,431 people without being able to look them in the eye.

Chen is scheduled to land in the Newark Airport on Saturday evening, May 19, 2012. From there, his announced itinerary will take him to New York University. In one fell swoop, he will speed from the Garden State to the Empire State, with no reasonable explanation for either term. “Where are the gardens and empires?” he might ask if he could see.

Particularly since the advent of videos, DVDS, computer gaming, and Facebook, America has become an enormously visual experience. Most recently, an orphan even found himself by researching his personal history on the internet. Yet this international orphan cannot now see himself as Americans commonly inspect their reflections.

He cannot then speak to them in their own visual language, no matter how eloquent or crude his English—unless there’s an app for that, too. Nevertheless, his status in the United States will confound more than diplomats. Should Americans consider him “disabled”? Not a word has come out of China supporting the conclusion that Chen is a hair less than extremely able.

In fact, if he runs a school for activists here, he just may activate a whole new school of thought. What exactly does an “activist” do? If Chen’s an “activist,” what is the rest of the human race? And, while he was speeding from Shandong Province to Beijing, did it occur to him to check his self-image? Maybe that’s how one becomes an “activist”—by neglecting mercurial mirrors.  


The United States Census Bureau runs its US and World Population Clocks here: 

The remarkable story of a Philadelphia man finding himself on the internet appears here: 

Monday, May 7, 2012

Hollywood, Move Over! Here Comes Chen Guangcheng!

Hollywood, Move Over! Here Comes Chen Guangcheng!                                                                                      

By Meg Curtis

When Chen Guangcheng escaped house-arrest in China, with a brilliant scenario he leapt ahead of Hollywood’s Great Escape writers. On April 22, 2012, he managed his daredevil act while blind. He even broke three bones in his foot—and still outfoxed every hostile pursuer in a population of 1.3 billion.

Right now, Clint Eastwood is probably wondering: Why didn’t I think of that storyline? I could have starred in it, too! 

Chen will surely count among the greats in updates to Steven Novak’s “History’s Ten Greatest Prison Escapes” (  Never mind that China considered him a criminal, while the US lauds him as a hero. That double role lies at the heart of Novak’s compelling tales from Nazi death-camps, a Confederate prison, and even Stalin’s gulag.
This self-taught lawyer’s history as a civil rights activist in China also pushes him past the tawdry ingenuity of characters like “Bucky” Phillips. That American escape artist left jail by opening the tin roof of a kitchen with a can opener. “Bucky” was convicted of committing murder while staking out his former girlfriend’s residence ( =39219).

By contrast, Chen managed to produce TWO in-wedlock children in a country which outlaws excessive fertility, defined as ONE+. His latest adventures are available here: http://online. 3630404577387961407270728.html. But this question lurks in the future: If Chen comes to the US, is America ready for a creative thinker this successful at outwitting everybody and his communist brother?